Tuesday, April 23, 2013

I fucked up a little. :(

Winding down for the night as if I haven’t been “down” since Saturday night.  I hoping that going to bed early tonight will finally leave me more clear headed tomorrow.  Saturday night I strayed from my healthy candida cleanse/diet to drink.  I wasn’t planning on drinking more than 2 glasses of wine but the night ended up being completely fucked up and drinking was honestly my only escape.  It happens.  However the way I’ve been feeling since Sunday morning has been more than enough proof for my brain that drinking is no longer for me.  I was completely trashed at the end of the night & I walked home in the cold wearing only a hoodie like a dumb ass.  I bet I burned a ton of calories freezing my ass off though?  Like, literally?  You’d think so but…. No, instead I caught a slight cold that I’m still fighting off.  I will NOT give in!

Sunday I weighed myself and I was back up to 144lbs from 139lbs.  This is not only just a bummer to me.  It’s actually devastating because I’ve been working so hard to lose weight.  I dunno if you keep up with me on all my shit like twitter, instagram, tumblr &/or Facebook but I had been working out nearly every day last week.  I skipped Sunday and now of course, I’ll be skipping today because it’s nearly midnight & I think I’ll be better off getting to bed asap and getting an early jump on life again tomorrow.  I’ve gotten off track. 

Not only with drinking and skipping workouts but I’ve also been eating way too much.  I haven’t been eating anything “bad” (or anything not allowed on my candida cleanse) necessarily but I’ve definitely just been gorging myself since I saw the scale on Sunday.  When shit happens to discourage me I tend to self-sabotage to the max.  It could be worse.  I could be stuffing my face with delicious cake or yummy pizza but instead I’m stuffing it with vegetable matter.  It’s funny how even though it sucks that I’ve been overeating since Sunday, I’m actually just proud that I haven’t been stuffing my face with bullshit.  That shows that these changes I’ve been making in my eating habits are starting to set in permanently.  


Anyhow, so I basically just wanted to give you guys the bad news that I’ve backtracked.  I have no clue how much I weigh right now because I’ve avoided the scale for 2 days but I’m guessing it’s around 145 from the over eating of the veggies, salt abuse (I need to just throw out all the salt in my apartment because I’m clearly addicted), still retaining water from dehydrating myself with alcohol on Saturday & lack of commitment to working out since Sunday.  Sadly, there won’t be any new sexy shit like I originally planned on making this week for y’all.  Hopefully we’ll be straight & back on track by Sunday though.  Next week?  Keep up with me on tumblr, twitter, Facebook & tumblr & keep on encouraging me please!  I’m sorry about the delay.  I thought we had it there for a minute but I slipped and kinda sent myself down a quick route of self-destruction.  I hope to be back to my usually (at least lately) positive, productive and HEALTHY self tomorrow! :) 

2 comments:

kold_kadavr_ flatliner said...

That's cool. I fuck-up, too. But, yet, to git into Seventh-Heaven, first you gotta wanna trustNjesus, dear. How? Easy...

The more you shall honor Me,
the more I shall bless you.
-the Infant Jesus of Prague
( <- Czech Republic, next to Russia where Vlad Putin is... where the KGB is... where Moscow is... where the Kremlin is, understand?)

God bless you.

kold_kadavr_ flatliner said...

That's cool. I fuck-up, too. But, yet, to git into Seventh-Heaven, first you gotta wanna trustNjesus, dear. How? Easy...

The more you shall honor Me,
the more I shall bless you.
-the Infant Jesus of Prague
( <- Czech Republic, next to Russia where Vlad Putin is... where the KGB is... where Moscow is... where the Kremlin is, understand?)

God bless you.