Are you stalking me?

• 03:06 Fow some reason my damn computer isn't letting me update my clips4sale. Bah! I am gonna walk Jeb around the block now... #
• 04:09 I added a sexy video starring my naked ass and my very amazing hitachi magic wand on my clips4sale store! Wanna see? minurl.fr/ouu #
• 05:17 I'm gonna get some prescription specs like the ones Maddie Ferguson wears! Be jealous! (They are cheap as hell at walmart in the eye center) #
• 06:59 I'm going to bed... I'm starting that um fitness regimen tomorrow and it includes specific times waking up and going to bed! Goodnight! #
• 15:34 If summer wasn 't almost over I would totally buy this for myself... HOT! minurl.fr/xqn #
• 15:38 The Undress Jess word of the day is... "Monotonous"! Use it in a sentence please! #
• 15:50 Mwahahahaha... GAY! minurl.fr/xqr #
• 16:17 I fucking HATE Idiots: minurl.fr/xqw #
• 16:49 I just got my damned Digital Harinezumi Camera in the mail and it takes some fucking weird ass unheard of battery... minurl.fr/xqw #
• 17:11 Is there a way to find a n otebook totally filled in with the correct answers... Like this one? minurl.fr/xra I need this for school! #
• 17:51 I think I'm gonna order some chinese food. What should I order though? CRAB Rangoooooooon! #
• 18:20 Holy hot dude! There was a cute boy delivering the Chinese food today! I need to order more often! #
• 19:12 Whoot whoot! I ordered some Urban Outfitters sale stuff and got free shipping by using the code "FREESTYLE" at the checkout! #
• 19:37 I ate my chinese food and now I am mega sleepy:( Maybe just a one hour nap would be ok? #
• 19:47 I bought this neat mug today to replace the one my cats broke this morning! minurl.fr/xs5 BTW, if I glue it bacl together will I die? #
• 21:08 I am going to fucking kill everyone that works for my internet company. Fucking stupid fucks. #
• 22:51 Check out the HOT slave Leia themed cosplay booty shaking (BELLY DANCE INSPIRED) vid just added to my shakinit page! minurl.fr/xt5 #
• 23:32 The prettiest friend I ever had was my BFF in Jr High. I don't think I'll ever have anothe buddy like Alina Lynnville. What happened to her? #
• 23:52 I added the recently update d "Slave Leia" video from my shakinit page to my clips4sale store! Want to just buy a copy? minurl.fr/ouu #
• 01:22 I just ran my bath water and it ran totally cold. Thanks new upstairs neighbors! #
• 02:08 I'm doing that "Yoga for Indie Rockers" DVD after my show tonight on undressjess.com, does anyone wanna come over and get physical with me? #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

Are you stalking me?

• 03:42 Hahaha! It's the WTF blanket! minurl.fr/x0z #
• 04:41 I just realized that Lara Flynn Boyle has freckles. I noticed while watching Twin Peaks on HDTV. The last time I watched this was on a l ... #
• 06:48 I just updated my shakinit.com page with an awesome vid of me shaking my pudding to some old school Notorious BIG... minurl.fr/m5a #
• 07:07 I just got the most brilliant idea EVER! I could be a prostitute from One Eyed Jacks off of Twin Peaks for Halloween! minurl.fr/x1d #
• 07:32 I just added my newest shaki nit vid to my clips4sale store for those that like to pick and choose your j.o. material:) minurl.fr/p7s #
• 10:35 I just came up with a great (but heavy) diet and exercise program to follow for at least the next month starting Mon! I'll blog it tomorrow! #
• 10:44 The Undress Jess word of the day is "infiltrate"! Use it in a sentence please! Go! #
• 10:44 After I drink the rest of this Theraflu I am gonna crawl into bed. I really hope that Mickey Rourke doesn't INFILTRATE my dreams again! #
• 23:57 I just woke up and I only have an hour before my members show at undressjess.com to eat and get ready! Ack! #
• 00:22 Is anyone going to order stuf from Urban Outfitters today? Cause I have a code for free shipping: Enter FREESTYLE at checkout! Good unti ... #
• 01:04 I am live in my members chat on undressjess.com now! I can't believe I somehow got totally ready within an hour... Cum congratulate me! #
• 02:09 I'm chatting on cam trying to decide if I want to go out tonight for a drink or not. Come tell me what you think! minurl.fr/vqc #
• 02:20 Just took my 46th mugshot! www.dailymugshot.com/main/show/25691 #
• 02:26 You have maybe a half hour longer to chill with me and possibly see me nude on cam! minurl.fr/vqc (For cheap! It's happy hour!) #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

This woman is my hero. We have a similar type of humor.

Are you stalking me?

• 03:08 The Twin Peaks Gold Box arrived when I happened to have this flu. I'm Sipping on some Theraflu and watching the pilot for the umteenth time! #
• 03:26 I really dislike HD widescreen 16:9. I don't get why people prefer this over a nice huge square picture. And it ruins old stuff by cutti ... #
• 05:34 I wish I could find my damned dvd player remote control so I could watch the international Twin Peaks pilot! #
• 05:56 I love how my yahoo isn't letting me sign on because it says I am "signing on too often". WTF? Thanks for parenting me on my internet usage. #
• 05:58 I am watching the international version o f the Twin Peaks pilot now and it like has an actual ending. I have never seen this so I am stoked! #
• 06:42 There is just something about agent Dale Cooper's mouth that makes me want to put my vagina on it. Oh, and I ordered pizza! #
• 07:36 I want to shoot myself in the fucking face for ordering and eating that fucking pizza. My stomach must have a death wish for me. #
• 07:42 Where can I find a really awesome dream catcher online? Like something WAY bright colored and not totally cheesy... #
• 08:04 Oh my bad I guess there was only one alternate ending. I misunderstood the dvd's options! Either way that was pretty darn interesting... #
• 09:50 I missed Masters of Horror so fucking much. Now I have to buy season one! The dvd's actually come in a skull. #
• 10:40 Want to see the alternate ending to the Europian aired Twin Peaks pilot? minurl.fr/rwo #
• 11:36 I am going to be camming for 4 hours later today. 2 shows on undressjess.com, 1hr of privates and 1 show for the spunky network... SHIT. #
• 12:11 The UndressJess word of the day is "dispassionate". Use it in a sentence please! #
• 13:05 I'm doing my member's choice theme show on undressjess.com as slave Leia. What kind of music should I play for that? I am wearing the buns! #
• 13:16 Im going to buy this for myself next month: minurl.fr/wxe If you want to buy it for me first you can do so here: minurl.fr/wxf #
• 22:05 I just woke up from a dream about fucking Mickey Rourke and calling him "daddy". My sex drive is out of control. #
• 22:34 Have you (and has everyone you know) added me to facebook? DO IT! minurl.fr/x0p #
• 22:50 Audrey gets so much hotter after the pilot of twin peaks. WTF is that hair cut she is sporting in the pilot?! #
• 01:03 Time to play Truth or Dare Trivia in my members show on undressjess.com with yous guys! Come dare me to do something silly! (Or sexy!) #
• 02:07 Now it smells like my neighbors have caught something plastic on fire. I hate those guys already but then again I usually hate all neigh ... #
• 02:11 I'm in free chat waiting on someone to appear who want's to see me naked... Oh and I am eating this awesome peach! minurl.fr/vqc #
• 02:33 I'm skipping my second show on my site at 11pm CST. I just can't cam with the flu for 4 hours. I'll wear the slave Leia costume tomorrow ... #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

This is the Twin Peaks pilot alternate ending that aired in Europe!

Are you stalking me?

• 05:55 I am super ill and I wish I had something magic to drink to make me all better again :( Like hot alcohol with honey! #
• 06:20 Art School Girls of DOOM! minurl.fr/qn8 Weeeee! :) #
• 06:34 Remember you can buy clothes I need for beauty school in exchange for passes to my site! minurl.fr/wgv You can get a month or more! #
• 07:41 So much for my brilliant love plan... #
• 08:17 I am so tired of people saying they are going to do one thing but then they always end up doing everything else BUT that one fucking thing. #
• 11:29 Remember I need clothes to go back to beauty school! And I am giving passes for undressjess.com to those to help out! minurl.fr/wgv #
• 21:49 Me and Patsy are watching Grey Gardens and I am still sick but I feel a little better today I guess:( #
• 22:08 This is me and the Jebbie man! ping.fm/nSKqE #
• 22:26 I'm canceling my show again tonight at 7pm but I have two shows scheduled tomorrow to make up for today at 8pm and 11pm CST! #
• 02:14 I just ate more chicken soup and I am about to get up and force myself to walk Jeb. He probab ly has to pee bad considering I've been in ... #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

Art School Girls of DOOM!

Are you stalking me?

• 04:16 I went and had a few beers after going to the co-op. I'm pretty stoked that I know that place is so near to me now that I have been there. #
• 04:36 It smells like a fucking bathtub fart in here. I wish I had more booze but like here at my house and not at a fucking bar. #
• 08:57 Dude, being sick is totally lame. I would cut off the tip of my left pinky to never be sick again... even probably the whole pinky. #
• 09:25 I need to start getting like a ton of white shirts and black pants if I plan on going back to beauty school at the end of October... #
• 10:11 I just took some Tylenol. I really hope it helps me g et back to sleep or I am going to miss the stupid UPS man again in the damned morning! #
• 11:52 I have to much drainage in my nose and throat to be able to fucking sleep. But I'm so tired! All I want to do it eat too, I'll diet tomo ... #
• 11:54 My Digital Harinezumi Video Camera shipped today from Urban Outfitters! I am so stoked about this damn thing! #
• 12:22 I just ate the rest of my pizza leftovers and then downed two more melatonin pills. I will get sleep if it's the last fucking thing I do. #
• 13:02 Gah... I can't believe I ate the damn rest of that stupid pizza. I hate myself. I have to go cry in a corner now. #
• 13:19 I wish I would have been a girl scout. But I was too cool for that and now they are too cool for me:( #
• 17:58 Jeb's new toys and flea control stuff got here today! He's certainly a happy little camper now... #
• 18:01 I wish they made this hat for adults... minurl.fr/wgc #
• 18:05 I could go as Steve for Halloween if I had this! minurl.fr/wge #
• 19:09 For each item you buy off of my clothes for beauty school wishlist I will grant you a month access to undressjess.com! minurl.fr/wgv #
• 20:07 Cristine, the coolest chef in town sent me some chicken soup via Kelley that I am going to warm up now and sip to soothe my sore throat! #
• 20:44 I am watching the "Yoga for Indie Rockers" DVD and like this one girl is supposed to be advanced but always has a bent knee:( ANNOYING! #
• 21:27 I tried to return some phone calls about my meds and stuff but thier damn system was down so I have to just fucking call back tomorrow:( #
• 21:33 I have to go back to sleep now. Jeb told me this is ok because I got him "Mellow Mutt" chicken strip treats today and he wants to snuggle! #< /a>
• 02:18 This is probably not even necessary to post but I cancelled my chat tonight on undressjess.com due to me dying of the flu. Chicken soup me? #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

Are you stalking me?

• 04:29 Does anyone use skype? I have that messanger now and I like the live talk feature! You can add me! I'm UndressJess there, of course. #
• 07:14 My members show was pretty sweet tonight and now I am going to have some ice cream and watch the rest of this movie:) #
• 07:16 I may have just found my Halloween costume! minurl.fr/w6i Whadya think? #
• 07:24 Haha! WTF@ the description... " With the sexy Indian girl costume, you can make it rain on them Navajos." minurl.fr/w6j #
• 09:53 God damn it! I just blew 100 bucks at the 15dollarstor e.com and I really wanted to buy a super amazing Home Medic back massager:( #
• 18:31 FUCK YOU UPS! JUST FUCKING LEAVE THE GOD DAMNED PACKAGE!!!!!! #
• 18:42 I need this store to be in town! minurl.fr/wax #
• 18:48 I ordered a garden pizza for me and Jebbie Dog Man. Want a piece? :) #
• 18:50 Can you still buy poleroid film anywhere? I NEED SOME BEFORE IT'S TOOO LATE! #
• 18:55 What website has the skinny on the free streaming movies these days? I wanna watch a little something while I eat my pizza! #
• 19:09 Hahaha! Guess what movie I am going to watch while eating my pizza? "Bring It On: Fight to the Finish!" I looooove stupid movies! #
• 19:37 Bring it back!!!! Poleriod film, FOREVER! minurl.fr/wb2 #
• 20:10 I am going to call and ask some Qs about beauty school, maybe I can go back in Nov or Dec? We'll see... I'll let you know what I find out. #
• 20:27 Whoot! I have an appointment to enroll back into beauty school, although my grandma is strongly against it and that pisses me off. #
• 00:08 My cipher keep rolling like a rolling stone... minurl.fr/vqc #
• 00:12 I look like Sally Field's version of "Sybil" right now... Come look! minurl.fr/vqc #
• 00:37 I can't believe I ACTUALLY caught a DAMN cold. I mean shit I have stuff other than snotting and coughing to be doing! minurl.fr/vqc #
• 00:40 Just took my 45th mugshot! www.dailymugshot.com/main/show/25691 #
• 01:06 God I actually have a serious fever now. GREAT! Anyways time for tonight's members show on undressjess.com ! #< /li>

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

Are you stalking me?

• 06:30 Bruce saved my life by bringing me a big jug of water though I suspect he filled it up with tap water to trick me. Oh well! I drank it! #
• 09:01 Who can bring me more alcohol? #
• 09:06 Steve hurt me pretty bad. I hate life. #
• 13:29 What I find most infuriating is being treated as if no one else could possibly love me, but then again maybe no one could... #
• 14:50 I can't believe I woke up and can't get back to fucking sleep. Also I am pissed I have to sleep on the couch to make sure I am up to ca ... #
• 15:02 I think I am going to make some tofu fish for dinner tonight... minurl.fr/w3z #
• 15:17 I wish I had some chicken noodle soup to fix but I don't. I can't believe I am actually hung over cause like I still am having withdrawals. #
• 16:49 I got my MBT shoes in the mail and juts put my Smart Soles insoles and they feel like heaven on my feet. I don't want to take them off! #
• 16:59 Hahaha! I meant *just in my last update... Is "juts" even a word? I bet it is! #
• 17:03 Well since I caught the ups man I guess I can try to go back to bed considering I only caught 4 hours of rest. Oh and I can MASTURBATE now! #
• 00:58 I just gucking slept the entire day away, Grrrreat! So much for getting back on a normal schedule! #
• 01:11 gucking = fucking in half alseep web terms. #
• 01:38 That seed thing in the middle of a peach? Yeah, that thing is what I always imagined the inside of my vagina looks like. #
• 01:49 My chin is itching bad. This always happens when I am about to get really sick. I'm going to take some vitamins now... #
• 02:07 I need to get up off of my lazy ass and walk my dog so I can come back and get ready for my members show on undressjess.com at 10pm CST! #
• 02:11 So THIS is what my fellow stripper buddies made after their shoes were all worn out! minurl.fr/w6b Crafty! #
• 02:25 I recheduled my show for 1am CST instead of 10pm (like in a half hour) because I am just not fully awake yet! I hope you can still make it! #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

Are you stalking me?

• 03:05 This stupid dry lung cough thing is really driving me up the wall. Oh well... What can I do? #
• 03:32 I'm in the mood to watch Chicago yet AGAIN! Dude this musical fucking rules especially with Queen Latifa! #
• 04:07 Um did someone move in upstairs already or is the landlord upstairs working on cleaning the damn place still at 11pm on a Sunday? #
• 04:33 I'm looking for a flapper outfit to wear to the burlesque show next month... Nothing too costume like, how do you feel about this? http ... #
• 05:18 Wanna see what I got for my flapper outfit? Shoes: ping.fm/xrp2e Dress: ping.fm/Uef3m HAT! ping.fm/Zlu2a #
• 08:28 OMG! I forgot how awesome the episode was of Ricki dancing with Delia at the school dance! What an awesome dancer Ricki was! #
• 08:37 confession: I have never washed my own dishes and I almost always eat everything with chopsticks. #
• 09:39 I'm seriously considering going back to beauty school like maybe next month. What do you think? #
• 09:47 Just took my 44th mugshot! www.dailymugshot.com/main/show/25691 #
• 11:26 I have decided that I am not going to go to sleep "tonight" but instead I am just going to try to stay up all day and correct my schedule. #
• 12:19 Is it weird that whenever my stomach hurts eating a fried egg settles it? Cause it's my little wicca magic spell that I like to use. #
• 13:15 I really really really wish I could roller skate so I could try to join the derby however I am too old to try to learn a new physical skill. #
• 13:18 What should I be for halloween this year? It's not cool to dress like a skank anymore so I better think "covered". #
• 15:05 HOT! minurl.fr/vyo And I will glady agree! :) #
• 15:16 I'm awake and all but I am not getting anything done really for the fact that I feel like vomiting. More My So-Called Life? Um yes. #
• 16:19 I can't flipping wait to get Grey Gardens in the mail so I can make my grandma watch it! We are the poor version ourselves:) #
• 17:36 God damn it. Of course I would get sleepy at noon. OF COURSE! I should have known I wouldn't have made it through the day. #
• 21:44 I'm back up and considering ordering a pizza. I is hungry! #
• 21:56 Yay! I ordered pizza now who wants to come over and help me eat it and watch another episode of My So-Called Life? #
• 22:16 Fuck! I'm out of bottled water and I fucking forgot to order something to drink with my pizza! Lame. #
• 22:20 Hahaha! I totally made the pizza guy studder! That's always a nice feeling, to know I still got it! :) #
• 23:30 Um! I'm obsessed with flappers. It comes and goes, of course. WANT! ping.fm/Oirvn WHY? ping.fm/7hOGk #
• 00:17 I only have two more episodes of My So-Called Life to obsess over... Then I can you know do what the hell I am supposed to be doing. #
• 00:53 It smells like something is on fire and if my new neighbors caught my house on fire I am going to kill them. #
• 01:34 I went down to the mother fucking coke machine to get some water because I am dying of thirst and they only had fucking pop. #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

Are you stalking me?

• 04:08 I am about to jump in tonight's members show on undressjess.com and oh snap I have on a matching polka dot underwear set! And NEW hair! #
• 05:26 I feel all confused and sleepy. Detoxing off of prescription pills is probably the lamest thing EVER. #
• 06:50 Well fuck me sideways there might just be a My So-Called Life epidode I fucking haven't seen. Impossible? #
• 08:29 Special Halloween show episodes from the 90's always were so flipping awesome. Whatever happened to this tradition? #
• 10:25 My vagina is starting to feel the ache of the dreaded UTI! Oh no! #
• 11:28 Twitter won't let me follow any new peeps right now, I am over capacity! Have your buds add me and it will let me add them! minur ... #
• 11:30 I need to bag this weave (wrap it up) and go the hell to sleep. I'm finally tired and I have more of My So-Called Life to watch tomorrow! #
• 23:18 I'm making a flat bread kashi pizza for this next My So-Called Life episode! Yay, it's the overdose edition! #
• 23:33 I love Rayannes house on My So-Called Life. It reminds me of my friend Jessica Overstreet's house when I was in high school! #
• 01:04 I'm live in Sunday night members show now on undres sjess.com and I am wearing the same clothes that I've had on for three days... HOT! #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

Are you stalking me?

• 04:30 Why is it so fucking hot in my house right now? Good news! One of the pairs of jeans that came today fit! Thanks to 2% spandex! #
• 05:16 What is the best flea control stuff to get for a dog? #
• 05:25 For those of you guys that have seen him, do you reckon my dog is over or under 55 lbs? #
• 05:33 I ordered my dog some new flea stuff as I found one flea yesterday and like 3 on him today! I also threw in some treats and toys of couse! #
• 06:07 I am editing videos and putting up clean clothes. My stomach is flipping the hell out. #
• 06 :43 Yay! There is FINALLY a cold front coming through making me feel nostalgic for the precious autumn! Steve is coming over too! #
• 07:45 I officially retract my "yay" concerning Steve's visit. I need to stop abusing myself and try with someone else. Or at least by myself. #
• 08:01 Dude... Hulu fucking has My So-Called Life!!!!!!! OMG this was my most favorite show in the universe at one time! #
• 08:10 I am gonna drink a cup of chamomile tea, watch an episode of My So-Called Life and compose a blog entry. After that it's bed time! Nighty! #
• 09:08 I have created a monster. MUST WATCH MORE My So-Called Life!!!!! (Or bust.) #
• 09:54 I just made a new blog post about how much I loathe the area of town I'm in. Read it and post me some comments, whores! minurl.fr/rwo #
• 10:28 So much for falling asleep "early". I'm to into this "My So-Called Life" solo party marathon I seem to be having... #
• 10:39 Who wants to volunteer to be the "Angela" to my "Rayanne"? I need a calmer counterpart... minurl.fr/rwo More sober too? #
• 19:59 Oh wow! I want this new kit from Urban Decay... It's all of the primers in on handy set! minurl.fr/vsi #
• 20:28 People are so silly when they try to rip me off asking for free "samples" before they do business with me. Um, trust me guys I'm not an ... #
• 20:34 I'm going to start making flexibility/contortion videos for my site undressjess.com and my clips4sale store starting soon! Cool huh? #
• 21:07 FYI! My spycams are down cause the cable dude is here working on my stuff trying to figure out why my bandwidth is so low. They will return! #
• 22:35 I flipping want the dress Claire Danes wears at the end of the episode "The Zit"! #
• 22:38 Fuck so basically they ha ve no fucking clue why my internet is going at such low speeds. They have checked everything they possibly can... #
• 23:37 I've got new hair... new hair!!! I'm setting the spy cams back up as we speak, though ther are coming back on Monday to further investigate! #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

My So-Called Life

I’m sitting and watching an episode of My So-Called Life. I actually wasn’t old enough to catch this while it was on ABC when it was originally aired. I read the entire series in young adult fiction form way before I even saw a single REAL episode on MTV during that period where they ran the re-runs. Christ, looking at this now I realize how fucking simple it was during the mid-nineties. It makes me want to buy a crimping iron and wear over size flannel button up shits with stretch pants and cool-aid color my hair fire red. Oh wait, I guess I probably come off like that already…

I still feel the same exact way that I did when I saw this show for the first time…What was I, about 12? When I hang out at bars I always feel like I’m really just chilling in the school yard in 6th grade and I wonder, who gave all of these children booze? Why are we being trusted with all of these alcoholic beverages? Everyone I know acts like they are about that age anyhow whether they are 19 or 33. I exist within an immature generation of kid like adults that never seem to “grow up”.

Quizzes Girls Games

It’s getting super lame here. I have lived in the same area of town for several years now and during this entire time I have surrounded myself with the same exact faces and these people have not changed or bettered themselves in the least. If anything they have gotten worse over time. More alcoholic, ruthless, lustful, addicted, lying, cheating, whoring, little angry toddler monsters. I think sometimes if I moved just to a different part of town I might be better off. Even if there are more bars in other parts of this city that I might end up living near… There just can’t possibly be the pithy drama like there is here.

I want to hold auditions for new friends. That, or start taking taxi’s (because you know I don’t drive and even if I did I shouldn’t since I drink so damned much) to new bars and meet NEW people. Of course it’s totally obvious that I shouldn’t be trying to meet anyone worthy of having ANY TYPE of relationship in places where the lowest of the low gather… You know, like me. Maybe I should start going to book clubs or cooking classes instead?

Are you stalking me?

• 04:26 The withdrawals are back and how weird is that considering I haven't had a drop of Celexa in maybe 3 days? #
• 04:47 I am not feeling super well. Do any of my buddies in my area have a dvd I could borrow to veg out and watch with my animal friends? #
• 09:34 I want to move. If not OUT of this bullshit town, at least in another part of it that I can avoid the bullshit that exists in this area. #
• 10:01 Wait! I think I have a case of "the stupid". #
• 21:08 I am a mega bitch when I wake up so watch the FUCK OUT! #
• 21:19 I a m fucking full of range right now. I need a constant supply of alcohol on tap up in here... up in here. #
• 23:04 My poop is sick!!!!!!!! #
• 23:14 Two new pairs of jeans in a bigger size arrived at my house today. Oh and they STILL don't fit. Yet again... #
• 23:17 If you could get drunk with any celebrity, who would you pick and why? I woulf pick Margaret Cho cause we would be a hilarious duo. #
• 23:49 I am updating my spy cam laptops so the spy cams will be down for a little while but back up very soon! #
• 00:00 This is why I want to hang out with Margaret Cho. I'd pro bably have a heart attack/die at the chance to see her live! minurl.fr/vq8 #
• 00:05 I am live in tonight's members show on undressjess.com and remember I am doing two hours of private shows after chat special for you! #
• 01:05 My boobie is hurting for some reason:( Come hang out with me and cheer it up! minurl.fr/vqc #
• 01:17 I have a weird question for you health nuts out there. I am almost done with my herbal cleanse and it seems like I am retainling water... #
• 01:17 Also it seems like I have gained the bulk of this weight during the period of doing this cleanse, do you think it' s possible that... #
• 01:18 ...doing this herbal cleanse is actually slowing down my metabolism and/or making me retain water? Because I thought I would lose weight? #
• 02:03 I feel like mega shit right now and my brain isn't thinking and I fucking wish I never started taking drugs for my mental illness. #
• 02:07 For those of you wondering about my spy cams. I am still getting to them... #
• 02:51 Wanna see my real hair sans the hair pieces and/or weaves? minurl.fr/vqc Ha it's an afro! #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter .com/undressjess :)

Are you stalking me?

• 06:14 I really deserve so much better than to be disrespected by the way you treat me like I am fucking nothing. #
• 07:57 I'm super tired tonight and I wish my TV was getting reception so I could watch Mr. Ed and fall asleep:( #
• 10:11 Everyones talking about the damn cat in this video and I am checking out the owner's ass. minurl.fr/vhe #
• 10:21 Do people do this at the club? If so what fucking club, cause I think I am missing the hell OUT! minurl.fr/vhh #
• 10:30 Is this really a fetish? Because I can easily stretch myself into any of the positi ons seen here in this video... minurl.fr/vhl #
• 10:37 It's my bed time and Jeb is about to get power snuggled to the last inch of his life! He doesn't know what's coming... #
• 11:40 I can't sleep for the life of me so I'm up drinking coffee and going to write a blog post instead. #
• 12:13 Oh hey, I just posted a blog entry about my hate for email! Go read it and comment so I have more email to respond to! minurl.fr/qn8 #
• 12:17 Ding dong! LoudTwitter is BACK! Which old twit? The LOUD TWIT, Bitch! (Internet addicts rejoice everywhere...) #
• 12:59 Is the Show "Rick anf Steve" going to be back for a third season? I can't find any info on it online:( #
• 13:33 OMG! "Ricky" from My So-Called Life plays Evan on Rick and Steve! I had no idea! minurl.fr/vij #
• 13:57 Yay! My MBT shoes have been shipped and are on thier way! Fitness here I come! #
• 14:10 I'm going to try to sleep again and although that may be a silly idea considering it's 9am, I hope I don't wake up again until around 5pm. #
• 22:35 Yum! Sun Chips and Hummus are like my favorite snack ever. I had forgotten about this! #
• 00:24 A guy that looked like Tupac but with a multiple strand 7 inch long beaded beard just walked by my window. WTF is up with that fringe? #
• 01:58 I forgot how much I used to love BratMobile back in the day. I'm Rockin! #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

email will be the death of "UndressJess"

I can't sleep for the life of me. How is that some people are so damn good with their time and always seem to get everything done? It's like I might get one important task done a day but I am pretty sure that in all reality there is enough time to probably knock out my whole to do list in less than 2 or 3 days. Of course there has honestly been some tasks on my list that have needed to be done for more than a year. NO JOKE.

Things are always just sneaking up on me. Emails especially. There are are so many I get a day. Some are total bullshit like, “Bb u r hawt”. I appreciate the compliments home slices but just FYI if you send me that type of message and you know you do, I will not respond. Then within the mix of these useless emails there are actual important ones that need urgent attention from me to run my business in a smooth fashion. It's sometimes hard to decode the email inbox. I's go as far as to say it's impossible, so I actually have to go through each email individually to make the call of whether it's worth my time or not.

I'm positive that expressing this to you guys makes me sound like an unappreciative stuck up bitch to some extent because I should thank my lucky stars that people are actually interested enough in me to write me, comment my status updates, comment my pics, promote my website, join my website, jack off to me, pay me to be hot and basically give a shit about what I have to say. All that is very flattering and all but it's still hard to get the REAL WORK done like making videos, taking pictures, sending out promo content, update my site(s), make blog posts, edit pictures and videos, promote myself and my work and then while I'm at it I might as well forget about say... painting, learning a new skill, creating any type of art that is totally unrelated to my work and thus is fulfilling on an entirely different level.

Again I am tooting my own horn here but I am way to fucking creative for my own good. I wish I thought less in “ideas” and more in “production”. But I guess one needs the other to do anything in this world, right? I have an idea book that I am constantly writing down my new thoughts for awesome projects I would love to do but my brain is so scattered and busy that I'm lucky to complete the process of maybe one of these hundreds of ideas/projects a YEAR. Yeah a year. I don't know how to organize myself/my thoughts in a more concise manner to be able to get things done because no matter what awesome thing I WANT to do there always seems to be thousands of things I NEED to do. This even applies to more mundane tasks such as cleaning my house. I don't think I have EVER had a completely kept home.

Even now what I am doing by preparing this blog to keep you all updated on my life by purging my personal issues for all the world to read... is actually important. It might not be if say I worked at the local doctors office and maybe checked my email no more than twice a week but the fact is I work with the public and NEED the public to continue to be successful. So writing, something I love dearly even becomes a daunting task on the massive to do list. Why? Because I need you to continue to be interested in me and I have to give you meat to feed on to garner that curiosity of yours.

Maybe I am just full of shit though... I mean I am trying to ween myself off of some serious psychiatric drugs right now so maybe it's just the withdrawals talking. Either way I need to be off of here so I can answer emails and not get anything worth a damn actually done, EVER AGAIN.

HAVE A GREAT DAY!

Are you stalking me?

• 04:03 I made it through the DVD for the first time but not without pulling a muscle in the back of my right arm :( #
• 04:06 It's been two hours since I got out of the bathtub and my hair still isn't dry even at ear length. That's some fucking thick ass hair. #
• 04:44 Anyone want to grab a beer with me? I need something to knock these celexa withdrawals! #
• 18:01 I pulled an emotional muscle at the bar last night... This leaves me hungry and horny today. Boooo! #
• 19:33 It really sucks I dont have paypal cause I would go nuts buying shit on Etsy!minurl.fr/vge #
• 19:37 Hot! I am like so into finding belly dance gear right now but really I need to get off my ass and make my own stuff! minurl.fr/vgg #
• 22:03 I found another 4 leaf clover and now it's time to go get some groceries! (Also a quick stop at Wendy's!) #
• 22:06 There are two icons of me that you can use for forums or livejournal and the like located here: minurl.fr/vgk My buddy made them! #
• 01:05 My internet is being weird but I am live in tonight's Truth or Dare Trivia Show on ping.fm/nSoSB ! I have my real hair too! #
• 02:47 Sorry about the weird tech difficulties tonight in chat guys! I called and have someone going to come out and check my i-net on Sat! #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

Are you stalking me?

• 03:10 I had sex with this fucking thing for a year and a half. Please tell me why I did that to myself... minurl.fr/v8n #
• 03:33 My Monday Night Member's Show is in a half an hour on undressjess.com! Be there or be a loser! #
• 05:08 I really want one of those Wendy's toffee shakes. Who's with me? #
• 05:20 I really, really, REALLY wish I wouldn't have fucked my tv antenna earlier cause I want to watch some shitty tv:( I'm gonna mess with it... #
• 05:29 OMG! I somehow got the TV to work and flipping FOXY BROWN is on! I just hit the jack pot! #
• 06:23 What kind of tea do they drink most often in England? Or is it all different types? #
• 06:28 I'm deep conditioning my hair and brewing some chamomile tea. What are you doing? #
• 08:18 I broke a huge glass pitcher in the fucking bathtub. This means I will most likely not rince the conditioner out of my hair just tonight... #
• 22:55 Please dont steal my fucking photo's of me or otherwise and put them up on your stupid social networking sites. #
• 23:30 I can't seem to wake up... I'm gonna take B complex vitamin and see what happens next? #
• 00:27 Would someone use paypal to buy this for me? I dont have PP:( And I want it for my belly dancing stuff! minurl.fr/vcz #
• 01:20 I need to walk the dog but the landlord is lurking in the hallway and I don't want to deal talking to him & I bled in my new yoga pants :( #
• 01:28 I am looking for folks with similar interests/ideas to do blog link trades with! Please contact me! minurl.fr/jpt #
• 02:00 I am skipping my members show tonight again. This will soon stop and I will be normal once this god damned celexa is out of my system. #
• 02:58 I am not doing a show tonight BUT I am about to do a belly dance practice DVD if you wanna tune in on my spy cams! minurl.fr/jpt #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

Are you stalking me?

• 03:30 Fuck this noise, I'm going to have some beers. Don't let me binge eat when I come home trashed either or I am holding YOU responsible! #
• 06:15 Where are all the hot little emo boys with hot dicks that wanna do me and worship the groud I walk on? I am fucking missing out. #
• 07:56 I am sleepy and I am going to bed super soon. Bars are stupid! #
• 08:08 My feet are chapped and I hate being a chubber. Come snuggle me to sleep! Weeeeeeee! #
• 18:23 I hate when you get addicted to a show and then find out there was only two seasons of it:( #
• 18:45 I was having so many sexual dreams last night. Quittng this anti-depressant has been insane on my sex drive! #
• 19:25 Don't any bangles exist in this world that won't turn my arms green or break my wallet? #
• 19:40 These are the kind of dudes I am terrified of. The "frustrated" ones. minurl.fr/v82 #
• 20:19 My skin is getting increasingly dry. Is there a toner for dry skin? How about a moisture mask? Let a bitch know! #
• 21:44 I just fucking broke my piece of shit digital antenna and possibly the fucking thing it connects to the TV on. Cool, no more fucking tv. #
• 22:14 I am so fucking pissed I fucked up my TV that I could just fucking explode or kill someone. Bring me some god damned sushi! (Or Wendy's!!) #
• 00:58 I am having so many laughs watching the second season of "Rick and Steve"! When the sun is %100 down I will walk Jeb, or after this episode! #
• 02:31 I am totally full of rage right now. Oh well at least I'll lose weight now since I'm off that medicine! Baahahahaha! #
• 02:38 I just cut my fucking face shaving off my eyebrows. Cool! I rule, obviously. #
• 02:41 How flipping old is Jeffree Star? I bet he's secretly like 48. #
• 03:10 I had sex with this fucking thing for a year and a half. Please tell me why I did that to myself... minurl.fr/v8n #

My daily tweets can be followed in real time @ www.twitter.com/undressjess :)

STALKER ALERT!

So at first I was just getting some weird emails from him that weren't very kind or soft about my spy cams when they would go down at points. I DO welcome my members to send me emails or instant messages letting me know when it happens because more times than not it's actually the servers fault at the random places that I choose to host them through...

And thus is started...

1. Brett (Last name removed)
to undressjess

cant get to chat and see ur cams why not belong to your site

Jessica Cook
to Brett

Follow up message from me
What are you having problems with? I will try and help as best I can!


There was NO response from this which I found extremely weird considering he was so eager to check out what I was doing...

2. Brett (Last name removed)
to undressjess

ur not on cams for show tonight

Jessica Cook
to Brett

Follow up message from me
no I wasn't using camz it was models plugin but I was having trouble with my internet connection.
I just got off of the phone with them and it should be working great now so I am rescheduling for tonight if there is another slot open. Check my blog for the new time!

Jess

Ok again I found this very strange as I made a blog post about this as soon as the problems popped up which is conveniently placed on the very FIRST PAGE of my members area and there is really no way a person can miss this. This was the only email that I received that night of this nature...

3. Brett (Last name removed)
to undressjess

thought show was at 10:00 cst

Jessica Cook
to Brett

Follow up message from me
That's correct did you not see my post on twitter about it?
http://twitter.com/UndressJess
:)
Jess

Again I was seeing a strangeness here as my twitter publishes on the first page in my members area and I make it SUPER clear that if I cancel any shows due to me not feeling %100 that my members should follow my twitter account to see my updates to be able to keep up with what I am doing. Also again he didn't reply once I replied and it just seemed off...

4. Brett (Last name removed)
to undressjess

only have 2 spyon you cams on why?

Jessica Cook
to Brett

Follow up message from me
They turn off without me knowing so I need people to let me know:) However the foot and the deskside cams are off on purpose because I am working on something on this laptop and can't run the streams along with the heavy programs I have open. However there should be 5 open on spyonyou. I will check on those now...

Ok are you guys seeing the short rudeness he has in his writing tone? Not to mention the obvious bad English? Next though is where is starts getting SUPER CREEPY...

5. Brett (Last name removed)
to undressjess

Follow up message
I live in evansville heard wfie14 on ur spy on you I live off of broadway by Howell park do you know where that is this is funny we live near eachother im streak714

Jessica Cook
to Brett

Follow up message from me
Ha nice! I'm not a %100 sure where that is but then again I obviously don't get out all that much:)

Jess

Now as you can see I wasn't super concise in my response here and I have known he lived in Evansville this whole time and just assumed he joined because I may have left my business card at a bar he may have went to... cause I do that. He then sent another email right away and in my chat that night asked me if I had read it and insisted that I read it immediately and "TELL HIM THE TRUTH". I read the email during the show quickly and this is what it asked:

6. Brett (Last name removed)
to me

do you live in Evansville I promise not to tell anyone just like to know if we live in the same town

I replied live in chat that yes that is where I live as I do not try to hide my whereabouts. He then left chat abruptly and then I received this next email later that night:

7. Brett (Last name removed)
to me

no strings attached I would like to meet you in person just to know that I met you

Jessica Cook
to Brett

Follow up message from me
I really don't do that. I mean sometimes if I model for events or what not that's a possibility because I invite everyone to come out and see me but not really on an individual basis:(

Jess

Brett (Last name removed)
to me

k just thought Id ask seeings how were in the same city just wanted to see in person

I chose not to respond as there was really no more I had to say about that...

7. Brett (Last name removed)
to undressjess

only have 3 cams on in spy on you still like to meet you here in evansville just to see you in person

Jessica Cook
to Brett

Follow up message from me
Thanks for letting me know! I am working on getting the rude cams and bedroom cams and tub cam back on... That computer messed up on me and I had to restart it!

As you can see this is pretty much starting to become annoying as hell. And he should really get the clue that I am not going to meet him, or so I would think? But then the emails about my spy cams are getting more frequent and I really think this might give anyone the impression that they are down quite a bit but they aren't!

8. Brett (Last name removed)
to undressjess

desk side cam not on

Jessica Cook
to Brett

Follow up message from me
Right my main computer runs that cam and because I also need this laptop to run all kinds of other programs that one and the feet cam can't always be on:)

Jess

9. Brett (Last name removed)
to undressjess

only 1 cam on ur spy page is on

Jessica Cook
to Brett

Follow up message from me
Thanks! I'll get them:)

I am getting shorter in my responses because I am starting to become highly bothered by these short and rude emails. I have tons of help keeping my streaming cams on as they turn off sometimes for no reason due to the site I run them through, but I never get messages so short most people are super kind and understanding about this! The next email I get from him is just fucking gross and this is where it seems to just get WAY out of control...

10. Brett (Last name removed)
to undressjess



I chose not to reply to this but I also make it super clear in any profile online and various times in my member chats that sending me or any girl a picture of your cock on the internet is going to turn me off because it's fucking just retarded on the dude's part.

Later that night these were the final emails that were exchanged between the two of us...

11. Brett (Last name removed)
to me
still like to meet you in person

Jessica Cook
to Brett

Follow up message from me
Sorry, I'm not sure what to say to you... I really don't just meet people like that unless it's an event I am participating in. I'll let you know if anything comes up though!

Jess

Brett (Last name removed)
to me
ok ur just a tease cant face ur members face to face

Jessica Cook
to Brett

Follow up message from me
Are you serious? What do you mean I am just a tease and can't face my members? Is that what you signed up for? Me to hang out with you? NO. My website is a website and I am VERY interactive and I offer more than most sites out there. It's not in your bill to hang out with me. I am not denying you something you have paid for.

Jess

Because of this freaking me out and beginning to sound like a stalker type situation I did a little research on him with the info I had on him and gave his full name and the address that I found for him on a public website to my closest friends and family to be able to contact the authorities with that info if anything else happens.

Tri-State Artist, Thinkers, Performers and Girls who like to Tease!

Weird question...

If I were to want to start a group of performance artists that perform with a burlesque influence would you or anyone you know be interested in contributing in anyway or know of a great place to perform/practice?

I am not saying that this will for sure happen as I cannot take on the full responsibility or being "in charge" of such a project and would need the help of the community as a whole to pull it off. I am however very interested in being apart of a group of individuals that are comfortable sharing in the responsibilities equally.

Please contact me at moxietarte@gmail.com if you are interested in any aspect of participation including but not limited to:
proving practice space
PERFORMING
dancing
singing
choreography
organizing
interested in having such a group perform with you at you venue or with your band or other performance act
visual artists willing to lend a hand in set production
play writters
skit writers
actors
coaching
anyone interested in helping promote
anyone willing to sponsor such an idea
thinkers
folks with cool ideas
ANYTHING

This is an open ended project idea and I am interested in any ideas or info you might have to offer.

Thanks and please pass this on by either making a bulletin or blog entry

Thank you so much!

Jess

Old School.

I made this during that nervous break down that I had... That really sucked, to say the least.

pocket knife